Last week was an emotional roller coaster. In a series of now-prophetic blog posts, I speculated that Mike Gatto may have quietly dropped out of the race for California State Treasurer. That led me down an existential rabbit hole in which, for the first time, confronted the question of what our blog would become if Mike Gatto left the race, lost, or otherwise retired from politics.
But just as important as the question of what happens to Mike Gatto is the question of what happens to our fansite, Mike Gatto is a Sweet Dude. If Mike retires from public life and returns to the quiet obscurity private citizenry, do we continue to document his every action (or inaction) with our trademark blend of journalistic curiosity and juvenile humor? Or do we move on with our lives, arbitrarily declare some other politician to be a sweet dude/sweet chick, and spend a decade speculating as to the size of his/her dick/vagina?
Yep… last week was fucking nuts. But last week ain’t shit compared to this week. In case you haven’t heard, Mike Gatto actually fucking withdrew from the race for California State Treasurer, explaining that he wants to spend more time with his baby. Noted Gattophobes pounced, suggesting his sudden departure could be linked to the mushrooming sexual misconduct allegations rocking the halls of Sacramento. Obviously, that’s not the case and anyone who believes it is a fucking asshole who is full of shit.
Regardless of the hows or whys, the fact remains that Mike Gatto has dropped out of the race for State Treasurer. Now all my paranoid fears about the purpose of our site’s existence are suddenly a reality. If Mike is no longer a politician and is now just some dad who rides his bike to work everyday, then why do we exist? Sure, he would still be a sweet dude with a big dick and two deliciously soft balls, but he would also be a private citizen who deserves a measure of privacy and respect not afforded politicians.
Do we just continue to write about state beastiality laws like we did a few weeks ago when Mike had effectively already dropped out of the race, and after days and days of Googling his name and finding fuck-all to write about, we just kinda gave up too?
No, god damn it. I’m not going to perpetuate this blog simply for the purpose of amusing myself and my partner, Daulton Gatto (no relation to Mike Gatto). We started this blog to document the work of a politician. We had lofty journalistic ambitions then, and at least I can say that I still cling to them today. Mike Gatto may be a sweet dude, but if he’s not a politician, I see no purpose in continuing Mike Gatto is a Sweet Dude.
I’m going to go smoke another fat blunt and see if it calms me down. There’s a slight chance it might make me more paranoid, in which case I may end up shutting our blog down altogether. Stay tuned!!!!!