The Sierra Madre Tattler is an amateurish piece-of-shit blog dedicated to the city of Sierra Madre, or as it’s also known, Pasadena’s toilet. It’s somewhat ironic that the Tattler exists at all, since the population it serves is mostly illiterate. They also like to fuck pigs.
Over the last few years of steady, reasonable leadership from Assemblyman Gatto, many of his fiercest critics have fallen silent or adopted a more contrite tone. The Tattler, however, has stepped up to fill their void, and continues to lure Gattophobes lurking in the darkest recesses of the Internet with lurid promises of scandals involving The Man With The Golden Dick.
In the past, they’ve made vague allusions to financial impropriety by the Gatto administration, however they failed to offer any follow-ups to substantiate these initial claims. More recently, they’ve begun a public campaign to unmask Assemblyman Gatto as the real author behind this site, Mike Gatto is a Sweet Dude.
Obviously, this claim is preposterous. There’s simply no way that a man as handsome, successful, or adored as Mike Gatto would waste any moment of his precious time on what amounts to a bunch of trivial Internet dick jokes. In the fantasy world of the Sierra Madre Tattler, Mike Gatto is a thin-skinned egomaniac, obsessed with controlling his own image and punishing his enemies in the most petty and childish ways.
Obviously, the truth is far simpler and more logical: two dudes just really like their State Assemblyman and made an awesome blog about it. Only minds as paranoid as those at the Sierra Madre Tattler could convince themselves of a greater conspiracy.
But in truth, those pig-fuckers probably don’t even believe the lies they’re spreading. It’s merely another chance to smear Gatto’s name through innuendo and unsubstantiated claims that will soon be forgotten. And the only reason Gatto hasn’t sued the Tattler into respectful silence (like the others) is because nobody reads their amateurish piece-of-shit blog… because everybody in Sierra Madre is illiterate… and they like to fuck pigs.