Anthony Portainto: Rich Fat Fuck

The Anthony Portantino campaign announced an additional haul of $437,120 for the most recent fundraising reporting cycle.  That brings his totals to $1.2 million dollars.  If you’re thinking to yourself, “Holy fucking shit that’s a lot of money for a a State Senate seat,” then you’re right.  It’s a fucking dickload of money for a largely symbolic political stepping stone.

Apparently, that massive haul puts him at the top of (declared) candidates for the 25th district, not that there are any.  Unless you count this pathetic piece of shit.

Not to downplay how impressive that $1.2 take is, let’s not forget that money doesn’t go as far as it used to these days.  Especially when you consider the Portantinio campaign’s daily budget for bacon, candied bacon, chocolate-dipped bacon, bacon bits, bacon cheese burgers, bacon cheese fries, bacon milkshakes, bacon-wrapped bacon and bariatric surgery.IMG_1858


About Jarvis Mitchell

author, politico, collector of pens
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One Response to Anthony Portainto: Rich Fat Fuck

  1. Pingback: Who is Stalking Jarvis and Daulton? |

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