Laurie Collins: MIKE GATTO IS A SWEET DUDE!!!!

In the strongest and most unambiguous terms possible, the Glendale News Press published an editorial commending Assemblyman Mike Gatto for being the sweetest dude with the sweetest dick and the softest balls.  Not in those exact words necessarily, but that was the main gist of it.

At specific issue was the recent editorial published by Dan Evans of the LA Times, in which he objects to Golden Dick’s involvement in the recent controversy over the election selection of local party delegates.  After scrutiny, it turns out that 16% of the voters in the election selection process were ineligible for a variety of reasons.  So as a champion of truth and justice, Gatto got involved and helped convince the body to host a new selection election.

Cynics would say that Gatto’s concern has less to do with truth and justice than it does with stacking the party deck with friendly candidates from the progressive wing ahead of his looming battle with Anthony Portantino for Carol Lui’s soon-to-be-vacated seat in the State Senate.

Whatever.  Fuck those assholes.  Mike Gatto is a sweet dude, and they are dudes whose entire existence is defined by the absence of sweetness.  And they have small dicks and sandpaper scrotums.

Here are some choice cuts from the editorial:

“… quite frankly there was no system in place to determine if the voter lived in the 43rd Assembly District, was registered as a Democrat, could not vote under the same rules applicable to primaries, voted more than once or even had a pulse. One could submit a ballot, wait in line again to receive another ballot, scribble a signature and submit a second ballot.”

“Since being a supporter of Assemblyman Mike Gatto places one under a cloud of suspicion under the rules of the News-Press, for the record I am supporting Mike Gatto. Not because I oppose Anthony Portantino but because Gatto is a stronger leader who has done an excellent job for the district and stands for issues that matter to me…”

“In the News-Press, based on Berdj Karapetian’s allegation, the results of the election were overturned because of the influence of Mike Gatto. This is the same Karapetian who with the assistance of former News-Press columnist Ron Kaye accused Gatto of discrimination because at the last election for delegates the organizers checked voter registration.”

So three cheers to Laurie Collins for standing up for Mike Gatto.  And three more cheers for calling out that Bukkake-loving charlatan, Ron Kaye, for his bullshit Gatto-hate.  As far  as we’re concerned, Laurie Collins is s sweet dude too!

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About Jarvis Mitchell

author, politico, collector of pens
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