Monthly Archives: November 2014

This Year I’m Thankful for Mike Gatto

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and I’m going to get superfuckeduphammered drunk.  So while I can still type, I thought it would be a good idea to briefly reflect on all that I am thankful for this year.  But the sad truth … Continue reading

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5 Easy Tips to Avoid Getting Raped by Bill Cosby

Bill Cosby is more than a funny guy on TV — he’s also a serial rapist whose 30 year, cross country rape-spree has been largely ignored by the media and the justice system.  Since nobody else is interested in protecting you, … Continue reading

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Mike Gatto OBLITERATES Todd Royal

With 100 percent of precincts reporting, Mike Gatto has been declared the official winner in the race for California’s 43rd Assembly District.  He won with a whopping 66% of the vote, trouncing and humiliating Todd Royal, the Republican party’s sacrificial … Continue reading

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We Officially Endorse Mike Gatto Because He is a Sweet Dude

Today is election day, and the authors of Mike Gatto is a Sweet Dude have decided to offer their official endorsement to Mike Gatto in the race for California’s 43rd State Assembly District because he is a fucking sweet dude with … Continue reading

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ISIS Will Kill Itself

ISIS is so full of shit.  First, they convince everybody they’re taking over the Middle East, when they’re not.  Then their leader started sucking all those animal boners.  Now everybody’s all worried about how we’re going to kill those assholes, when … Continue reading

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Mike Gatto Humiliates Todd Royal in First Debate

International Fuck Machine Mike Gatto recently squared off with his opponent in the race for California State Assembly.  Wait, I know what you’re about to say.  You’re about to say, “But Jarvis, I didn’t even realize Mike Gatto had an opponent … Continue reading

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