Todd Royal: TIME-TRAVELING SUPERCOP?!!?

As we now know, Mike Gatto’s opponent in the upcoming election for State Assembly will be Todd Royal, a man with the same chiseled, masculine features that helped distinguish Mike Gatto from the crowded field of hobgoblins and hunchbacks in the 2010 Democratic primary.   But who is Todd Royal?  His official site makes vague reference to artistic failures predicating a transition into catering and later politics.  But there’s still frustratingly little information available on exactly who “Todd Royal” really is.

Well, after using a “search” feature on a website called “YouTube,” I was able to uncover this tantalizing clue as to the true nature of Mike’s opponent in the battle for the 43rd district.

Though I’ve yet to uncover any further evidence as to the full story behind this video, I can only assume that “Todd Royal Demo Reel” is an upcoming action film starring Todd Royal as himself.  What else can we deduce from this leaked clip?  Well, Todd appears to be playing the role of a stalwart lawman with a strong jaw and an even stronger sense of right-and-wrong.  Scenes appear to be set in both the wild west and a quasi-urban surrogate for modern day New York City, which suggests Todd Royal’s stalwart lawman may be a time traveler!  And if that wasn’t sweet enough, his trusted partner on this epic journey through time appears to be KEVIN SORBO!  Ya’ll heard me right… Fucking Hercules.  Todd Royal and HERCULES!  Holy fuck!  That’s what Mike Gatto’s up against?!

I may have been a little cocksure in my earlier dismissal of Todd Royal’s chances.  I still have faith that Mike Gatto will emerge victorious and continue his lightening ascent towards the Mayor’s office and eventually Pennsylvania Avenue, but this time-traveling supercop and his Herculean side-kick may just give Iron Mike a run for his money!

COCLSURE

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About Jarvis Mitchell

author, politico, collector of pens
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7 Responses to Todd Royal: TIME-TRAVELING SUPERCOP?!!?

  1. Pingback: Earth to Todd Royal… WTF Were U Thinking?! |

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  3. Pingback: Todd Royal’s “Faery Hunt” |

  4. Pingback: Is Todd Royal a Government Spy? |

  5. Pingback: Mike Gatto and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Week |

  6. Pingback: 10 Dudes Who Aren’t As Sweet As Mike Gatto |

  7. Pingback: Who Actually Wrote “The Rise and Fall of Mike Gatto”? Top 5 Suspects |

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