Mike Gatto vs Citizens United

Mike Gatto, crusader for sweetness, chalked up another victory today when AJ1 passed the state senate. If you don’t know what AJ1 is, then you’re an idiot. It’s a bill Mike wrote that would leverage the power of state legislatures to pressure the national legislature into amending the Constitution. Why? To try and kill Citizens United, the Supreme Court decision that allowed for rich people and corporations to donate as much money as they want to a losing Republican candidate.

“Most Americans are fed up with the notion that money is speech,” Mike said as his casually unbuttoned oxford shirt allowed reporters a peek at his rippling man cleevage. “I doubt our Founding Fathers had the free-speech rights of multi-national and foreign corporations in mind when they drafted the First Amendment. But the Founding Fathers did anticipate that every once in a while, the states would need to prod Congress to act to amend the Constitution. That’s what we are doing.”

Damn straight.

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About Jarvis Mitchell

author, politico, collector of pens
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